Nefrit El-Or
Speaking
Coming Home to Yourself
In my talks, I share my lived experiences and the insights I discovered along the way to inspire others in navigating the human journey. Through raw storytelling, unflinching authenticity, vulnerability, and gallows humor, I create a space where others feel comfortable embracing and sharing their own experiences.
My talks span a variety of topics, bringing together personal narrative, insight, and a deeply human understanding of the challenges we face.
Above all, I speak to inspire hope. Having stood at the edge of death and found my way from self-hate to self-love, I carry a message that reaches far beyond my own story: healing and recovery are possible. Our worth is already within us. And no matter what we are navigating, the journey begins with self-love.
Speaking Topics
My talks can be tailored to different audiences, with an emphasis on lived experience, insight, and the healing power of self-love.
Breaking the Silence: Inside the Mind of Anorexia
I share my journey through near-death anorexia, treatment, and the realities of recovery, exploring the psychology and anatomy of starvation and the inner workings of the eating disorder within the mind. Through raw storytelling, I render interiority legible, offering a deeper understanding of anorexia, its mechanisms from the inside out, the different roles it assumes in one’s life, and its implications and effects on individuals and families. I take audiences inside the lived realities and clinical choreography of intensive eating-disorder treatment at its highest levels of care, revealing why treatment succeeds or fails, and what recovery demands long after discharge.
Late-Identified Autism: I Was Never Broken to Begin With
What does it mean to spend a lifetime believing there is something fundamentally wrong with you, only to discover you were never broken to begin with? I share my experience of being diagnosed as autistic at forty-three, exploring masking, identity, the autistic experience, and the journey toward self-understanding and acceptance. I address the growing recognition of autism in women, the consequences of a lifetime of misunderstanding one’s own mind, and the profound impact of finally understanding the differences once interpreted as defects.
Autism & Eating Disorders: The Dangerously Overlooked Intersection
Drawing on my lived experience with anorexia and late-identified autism, I explore the dangerously overlooked intersection between autism and eating disorders, how the autistic experience can shape the experience of anorexia, and why understanding this connection matters for recovery, families, caregivers, and clinicians. I examine the systemic misunderstanding of neurodivergent needs within eating-disorder treatment, the implications for recovery, and the urgent need for greater awareness and change.
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Women’s groups, women’s conferences, and women’s leadership organizations
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General conferences, public events, and community gatherings
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Medical and healthcare professionals
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Mental-health professionals, therapists, and counselors
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Clinicians and clinical training audiences
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Eating-disorder treatment centers, recovery programs, and recovery communities
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Autism and neurodivergence organizations, advocates, and neurodivergent audiences
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Families, parents, partners, and caregivers
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Mental-health advocacy and awareness organizations
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Spiritual communities, churches, and faith-based organizations
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Meditation groups, wellness communities, and retreats
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Personal growth, self-love, and healing communities
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Organizations and audiences seeking a deeper understanding of the human experience
Who I Speak To
Invite Me to Speak
For speaking engagements, conferences, workshops, and events, please get in touch to discuss your audience and the topics you’d like to explore.
Coming Home to Yourself: The Radical Power of Self-Love
Self-love is the root of all healing- the axis upon which everything turns. But what does self-love mean in actuality? I explore self-love as a becoming, a remembering- not changing who we are, but coming home to ourselves. Releasing shame and self-hate, making room for all our parts with unfaltering, radical Love, and discovering our worth within rather than seeking validation, approval, and permission from the world.
Joy Unfolds from Within: Acceptance, Equanimity & the Human Journey
I explore the freedom and inner peace that come from meeting life’s vagaries and adversities with acceptance and equanimity, finding meaning and our own unique purpose, and following our true joy as a compass toward a meaningful life. Joy is not dependent on external circumstances- it unfolds from within.
Love Consciousness: Meditation, Spirituality & Connection to the Divine
Through my spiritual journey and practice of Love meditation, I explore the power of the present moment, listening for the wisdom within, and connecting through meditation to the source of Love within and beyond us. I share my experience of Love Consciousness and the practice of living from a place of unconditional Love.
Podcasts
I recently had the pleasure of sharing my story on the Phil Young Broadcast. ❤️
We spoke about eating-disorder recovery, autism, self-love, healing, joy, and finding our way back to ourselves.
In Phil’s words:
"When we think about healing and growth, the biggest breakthrough often comes from facing our deepest struggles head-on-and understanding that the path to self-love is paved with challenges, fears, and sometimes, pain. In this heartfelt conversation, Nefrit El-Or shares her raw journey through anorexia, Crohn’s disease, autism, and the healing power of love, vulnerability, and inner joy. Discover how embracing your shadow and finding joy in everyday moments can transform suffering into strength and create a life of true freedom.
This episode unpacks profound insights on how trauma, societal judgment, and self-hate fuel mental and physical health struggles-and what it takes to break free. Nefrit vulnerably explores the dangerous link between autism and eating disorders, revealing the obsessive need for control that often drives these challenges. You’ll learn about the importance of setting boundaries, the role of self-compassion, and how spiritual practices-like understanding that love is the core of our existence-can guide us toward healing.
You’ll discover:
How trauma and medical diagnoses can feed disordered eating and mental health challenges.
The surprising connection between autism, rules, routines, and anorexia.
Why true joy is an internal compass rooted in self-love, and how to activate it even amidst adversity.
Practical strategies for recognizing shame, setting boundaries, and reframing pain as an opportunity for growth.
The power of tiny moments-like watching sunlight or savoring a hug-to restore inner peace and resilience.
This episode is a must-listen for anyone battling invisible scars, caregivers seeking understanding, or those yearning for tools to reclaim their joy. Nefrit’s story is a powerful reminder that even in our darkest moments, we carry the seed of love, healing, and true freedom. Whether you’re on your own healing journey or looking to deepen your understanding of mental health, this conversation will inspire you to embrace compassion-for yourself and others-and to find light in the midst of life’s chaos.
Join us for a candid, compassionate exploration of how love, acceptance, and awareness can heal the deepest wounds-and unlock an inner joy that nothing can take away."
He later shared this reflection on Facebook, which I also wanted to share here:
"The quiet power of self-love and the ongoing journey to heal:
I used to believe that my struggles with mental health, eating disorders, and chronic illness meant I was broken. But what I’ve learned is that these challenges are opportunities for growth-and the real remedy is self-love.
My friend Nefrit and I talked about how pain, trauma, and societal judgment often make us hide our true selves. We’re conditioned to think we’re not worthy of love unless we’re perfect. But the truth? Our internal joy, that divine spark of love and connection, is always accessible-if we choose to find it.
Healing isn’t about erasing pain; it’s about embracing it, understanding it, and letting it teach us. We don’t need to be static or perfect-life’s a continuous cycle of challenges and resilience.
The key is to listen to that inner compass-your joy, your love, your truth-and let it guide you toward freedom and peace. You’re not alone in this.
Maybe that’s the point."
"In this powerful and deeply moving episode of Pathways with Chris Anne Coviello, we sit down with multi-talented musician, writer, and healing guide Nefrit El-Or to explore the often overlooked intersections of adult autism diagnosis, eating disorders, creativity, and spiritual healing.
Nefrit shares her courageous journey through undiagnosed autism, her struggle with anorexia nervosa, and the profound impact of finally receiving an autism diagnosis as an adult—a revelation that transformed her path to recovery. Through the lens of her lived experience, she opens up about how music, meditation, and deep self-awareness became essential tools for reconnecting with her authentic self and reclaiming her inner voice.
This conversation is a must-listen for anyone navigating neurodivergence, mental health, disordered eating, or a late-in-life diagnosis. We discuss the cultural invisibility of women and girls on the autism spectrum, the role of somatic practices, and how creativity can be both a mask and a medicine on the healing journey."
